My Dad passed away today! It feels like a gut punch and I can’t seem to catch my breath today. It’s the worst feeling EVER!
I always knew this day would come. It does for all of us! Funny, I expected to have a mental reaction but not a physical one! My body feels numb. My stomach is wrenched up into a knot and I want to puke! I am not hungry. My head feels numb. My brain feels numb. My heart is heavy! I feel a welling up of a gallon of tears gathering strength but not able to be released yet. After-all, men are suppose to be strong, right Dad?! You taught me how to be strong and how to be man and I thank you for this!
I didn’t expect to have this reaction. Not that I didn’t love the man who brought me into this world and taught me how to make a parachute that an impressionable boy throws up into the air with a little army man tied to the bottom, made out of a grocery store clear vegetable bag with some string & tape….for I did immeasurably! It’s just that he taught me to be a strong man, independent, and not to show vulnerability.
It was only in the last few years that we said to each other “I love you” at the end of a phone call. Something that I wish was a normal thing for us in all our life. I’m sorry that I didn’t make the time from “my busy schedule” to see you as much as I should have!
I do know that you brought 4 amazing kids into this world which have accomplished much and you taught each of us to strive, and achieve in life! We would not be all that we are, and generations in the future will be because of your mind, teachings, and strength!
I love you Dad.